"Overall, the authors have created a practical, easy-to-read, and inspirational guide for other parents of children with disabilities. Considering the high divorce rate in society in general, many of the suggestions and strategies outlined in this book could be useful for any couple faced with marital challenges. The authors show the importance of nurturing marriages to help couples cope with the stressors of raising children with special needs. The book also demonstrates that it takes more than two parents to raise a child with a significant disability, and that it is important to make use of outside supports. This advice seems reminiscent of the old African proverb: 'It takes a village to raise a child.'"
-Read the entire review at The New Social Worker Online
"Without minimizing the difficulties of nurturing a marriage while nurturing a highly needy child, the authors point out ways to sustain and strengthen the ties of ove, not just of duty, that bind spouses together. It's an encouraging, even inspirational, read."
-Terri Mauro, Guide to Parenting Special Needs
Read the entire review at specialchildren.about.com
"While the birth of any child brings changes and challenges to all marriages, couples who have special needs children often find themselves facing additional stress and problems that can cause marital difficulties. In Married With Special Needs Children, Laura Marshak and Fran Pollock Prezant offer parents of children with disabilities insight and advice drawn from their professional backgrounds in marital therapy and parent training.
Their book, the first of its kind, is a compassionate and wise guide to recognizing concerns such as communication breakdown, decreased time for intimacy, managing and sharing child care, and differing expectations for their child with special needs. In addition to offering their professional expertise on how to cope with these challenges constructively as a couple, the authors also include advice and experiences from hundreds of parents. Much-needed and long overdue, this book is highly recommended for parents, support groups and related organizations, and professionals in the mental health and health care fields."
-Disability Resources Online
"As all parents of kids with ADHD know, raising a child with special needs can place strains on your relationship. In Married with Special-Needs Children, the authors address these challenges with compassion and understanding. They offer practical advice on how to manage the many demands on your time, make full use of your available resources, and maintain a healthy support system, whether your child has ADHD or a severe disability."
-ADDitude Magazine, September 2007
"Listings of special needs resources and suggested readings at the back of the book complement this invaluable edition to any family or clinical library."
-Exceptional Family, Vol. 2, No. 3, Spring 2007
"Unlike other first person narratives on coping, this book, written by professionals, incorporates not only professional guidance but also the journeys of others who have walked the path with special needs children."
-CAPHIS Consumer Connections, Vol. 23, No.2, 2007
"If you're married and have children with special needs, you probably don't need to read a book that discusses marital stress. In fact, you could probably write your own book. However, if you have ever felt like you're the only one who feels a certain way about your spouse of your child, this book can be extremely helpful in not only validating your feelings, but also in providing plenty of ideas and strategies for improving your relationship.
One of the most important strategies for improving relationships is good communication. The communication skills we use children, and to collaborate with medical teams, school personnel, and community providers are the same skills that are essential to a strong marriage. And, when all else fails, don't forget the art of compromise, even if it's just to agree to disagree.
Each chapter includes family stories that lovingly illustrate this book, reassures readers that they are not alone and helps break through the isolation married couples sometimes feel both from each other and from other couples. Practical advice from the authors and other parents include ways to cope with stress, and a reminder to respect each partner's coping mechanism."
-Federation for Children with Special Needs Newsline, Fall 2007
"Bringing hope to families, Married with Special-Needs Children: A Couples' Guide to Keeping Connected is a resource offering personal experience as well as professional help. The authors, Laura E. Marshak, PhD, and Fran Pollock Prezant, Med, CCC-SLP, present a wealth of knowledge in the fields of working with families of special-needs children and family support services. They have aptly documented their experiences with practical strategies applicable to couples struggling to keep their marriage together while also caring for a child with special needs.
The contents of this resource include basics of marriage structure and problem-solving as well as addressing the specifics of stressors brought to a marriage when coping with the difficulties surrounding a child with one or more disabilities.
Appropriately titled, 'No Longer Cruising Down the River: The Early Stage of Adjusting to Disability,' chapter two comprehensively addresses the stages leading to acceptance of a child's disability and proceeding beyond guilt and blame to a strong and healthy outlook.
Practical solutions specific to the parents of special-needs children are given as well as general communication strategies and problem-solving relevant to any marriage. Chapter five speaks of the importance of and struggles with romance and sexual intimacy for a couple with a special-needs child. It gives the reader an opportunity to identify with the contributors and learn from those experiencing the same difficulties. Discussions of implementing roles, stress management and coping strategies are included.
The authors touch on components such as conflict resolution, compromise, striving for fairness, exercise, relaxation and seeking outside support. Final chapters comment on divorce, remarriage and long-term marriages. Married with Special-Needs Children contains quotes from parents of special-needs children reflecting on personal situations. These are mothers and fathers of one or more children with Asperger's syndrome, fragile X syndrome, autism, multiple disabilities, Down syndrome, cerebral palsy, mental retardation and AD/HD.
They offer camaraderie and hope to the reader with reflections such as, 'we eventually felt a real strain in our marriage; we had some long talks and slowly started working together. It took us about three years to fully accept our son's special needs.' And comments offering personal perspective: 'The most important thing in my life is my marriage. Raising a special-needs child takes so much energy that I think we have to remain as healthy as possible with ourselves and each other.'
The layout of this book makes it an easy read with 15 well-titled chapters, highlighted quotes from parents and boldfaced summarizing sentences. Frequent checklists and conclusions with pertinent, useful to-do items are added. Three appendices are included with additional words of encouragement and identification. A resource section at the end of the book, as well as references throughout, is comprehensive and useful to parents of children with varying special needs.
In Married with Special-Needs Children the authors have presented an excellent book on the subject that may or may not be needed by your patient population. But the resources alone and the empathy it offers would make this text a valuable addition to the library of any therapist working with special-needs children."
-Advance for Physical Therapists & PT Assistants, November 5, 2007
